Living in a War Zone

We often forget that the lives we know are really in the middle of a battle zone for the soul.   Jesus has already won the victory, but not everyone knows that and so the enemy does his best to lure, deceive and taunt.   His lies are smooth, but they have destructive result.

Tonight was one of those nights in our home.  Our house guest just wanted to stay in bed this evening, even though we were supposed to be at Organic Group.   She became rebellious and defiant with Carol and would not speak to me.   It was time for Carol and I to gird ourselves up and stand in the gap.   The triggering mechanism was a lies of hopelessness and the need for comfort…”a cigarette sure would help, you can’t make it without them.”

For nearly an hour we spoke truth and prayed over our guest.  At one point she told me she wanted to return to the street, because she couldn’t handle it anymore.   After an exhausting exchange, love won out.   The Lord once again broke through the lies and darkness, allowing our guest to see the truth of the love around her.  She broke down in tears, having trouble understanding how people could love her enough to fight for her.

Of course the enemy wasn’t quite done yet.  Our Organic Group host and her brother are both smokers.  Bless his heart, he has a learning disability and in his charming, simple way he offered our guest a cigarette.   She stood firm…battle #1 over and done.   She then went to the kitchen to get more coffee and there on the counter was a pack of cigarettes.   She began to tailspin once again.  So we gathered around her, prayed and got beyond it.   On the way home, she began to realize that she had been under the influence of a spirit that was not hers and she also recognized that she had been victorious.

Our guest doesn’t know much about God or Jesus, but He is showing her great things about His love for her.   After our guest went to bed, I had to remind my wife that she too was victorious.  We are both being stretched.  This is not the ministry assignment we originally signed up for, but it is the one God has given us and for that we are grateful.

I Really Want to Know More About Jesus

All I can say is that God is awesome!  His power is incredible!   How I got to have a front row seat, is beyond me…I’m just glad to be here!  Let me give you the highlight reel:

  • Our house guest today was floored, astounded (insert any other appropriate word here), because she realized late this afternoon that she had not had a cigarette in over 30 hours, and she had not even had the craving for one.
  • Today she was watching a video series of the Gospel of John that we have.  She was holding up the box saying:  “I really want to know more about Jesus.”   I told her that He wanted her to know more about Him also.   Startled, she looked at us and said:  “Did I say that out loud?”   The overflow of a heart touched by the love of Jesus is a beautiful thing.
  • Tonight she asked Carol to read scripture to her as she went to sleep

We also felt her pain as she talked to loved ones and learned that her daughter had recently spent time in jail.   The enemy tried to overwhelm her with hopelessness, but the Lord brought comfort through her tears.  I challenged her to be the demonstration to her children of how God can turn a person’s life around.

Tomorrow I will be meeting with two fellow ministers from the area to discuss how our ministry neighborhood can be set free by Jesus, and how He wants to use us in that process.

Weekend Update

Yesterday Mike and I met up at the church with my friend William, who leads a local intercessory prayer ministry here in Corpus Christi.  William and his wife had been at our house warming last week and heard some of the spiritual warfare things Mike and I were encountering.   He had asked us to meet with him, so that he could encourage us and provide some basic principles for us to utilize in this area of our faith walk.

Within a matter of hours I found it necessary to deploy some of these suggestions, especially those dealing with expanding my prayer covering.   Before the day was over, we would see Christopher encounter a serious blowout on a Houston freeway with a car full of Navy cadets, our daughter would crash her bicycle into our pool and the ignition switch went out on our van.

Christopher's car after the blowout

Christopher's car after the blowout

After the Loop 610 incident

After the Loop 610 incident

Yet through it all, God showed Himself faithful.  Christopher and the other cadets were not hurt.   Caitlyn was scared, but also unhurt (although her CD player didn’t survive 4ft of water) and a tap from a rubber handle on a socket wrench got the key to turn in the van.

During the afternoon we called on those that God impressed upon us to surround us in a covering of prayer.   By 4PM, the spirit of peace within me was overwhelming…those prayers could be felt within and without.  We did however call my friend William and asked him to bring a group of intercessors to our home to pray over us and the home.

This morning, I woke up with a heaviness looming over me that seemed very unshakeable.  Even as I prayed before service this morning, I just couldn’t seem to shake it.  Even Mike’s wife, Kim, could see it on my face.   When I got done praying, I opened the door of the church and sat back down.   I watched out the window as a woman walked past and then made a button hook into the door.

She declared that she was tired of living on the streets and asked if we could help.  At first it was the normal request:  “A few dollars for bus fare to Flour Bluff and something to eat at Whataburger.”   I asked her if we could pray for her, but she didn’t answer me.   She went on to elaborate that she had not slept, that she needed to wash her clothes and that she wanted to get off the streets.

I told her that we did not give out money, but that I would make sure she was fed and we would give her a ride to Flour Bluff if needed.   I also offered to let her do laundry and share lunch with our family and Mike’s family.   She balked and said she just needed money.  I asked her how a few dollars was going to get her off the street?

After a few moments of silence, she asked if she could just have some coffee and said she was going to leave.  I reminded her that she had not answered my question about praying for her.   She told me I could pray for her, but she saw my bottle of annointing oil and told me that I could not annoint her with oil.   I told her that was fair.

I prayed for her deliverance from the streets and the bondage that kept her there.  She sat for several minutes, got some coffee and sat down.   I started into the service and she kept staring at me.   Then all of the sudden, shen leaned over and asked me if we would really help her out as I had indicated before.   I reiterated what I had said and then the Lord gave me a word of deliverance that went straight to her heart.  Immediately the tears began to flow and we bathed her in prayer.

The Lord had already been impressing upon my wife and I that part of the reason He moved us to Padre Island was to create a safe haven for people He was delivering from the streets.  Out here there is no city bus, no red light district, no street culture…a place of safety.   Carol and I both felt compelled without speaking that she was to be the first to find the healing and deliverance of God’s kingdom in our home.

As we drove to Mike and Kim’s for lunch, the tears continued to flow…but they were tears of joy and laughter that burst forth from within.  She also indicated that she has smoked her last cigarette, so I prayed over her cravings, yearnings and desires.  Our new house guest said she had not laughed in years.   While lunch was being prepared, our guest showered and was given a new change of clothes.  The woman who shared a meal with our families was not the same woman who had entered our door a few hours before.

As the afternoon wore on, the pain of years on the street was released in tears as Carol held tightly to her.  I found myself weeping in the adjacent room as I listened to God releasing the pain from within.   Several times she exclaimed..”I can’t believe I’m not craving a cigarette.”

This evening the days of hard living had ended in an early bedtime.  Carol has already had to comfort her once, because of the nightmares she was having.   Our guest’s greatest fear is that we were going to dump her back on the streets.  The mess the enemy makes out of people’s lives….truly the earth groans for the touch of Jesus.

Also this evening the intercessory team spent time in our home.   The Lord spoke to the group collectively about the testing that Carol and I have been under, saying:  “They passed.”   Of course that word was proceeded with the word “patience.”

My friend spoke a valuable word to me as well.  My role in the kingdom is parental in nature…when the time is right the “fatherly” blessing I give as those restored spread their wings and fly will become monumental.

Saying Goodbye

Tonight I was helping to load a moving truck and for once it was not my own.   This time, I was helping a lady who has been apart of our ministry since we arrived in Corpus Christi.   She had the opportunity to retire and move closer to family in Louisiana and so today we loaded her home into a 26′ U-Haul and savored a few final moments of Christian fellowship with one another.

The Lord again showed Himself faithful today, as I had a small commission check arrive from my financial advisory business, enough to pay two bills.    This evening a friend and his family we hadn’t seen in a number of months showed up where we were helping load the moving truck and handed my wife and I a gift that had been impressed on his heart.   The Lord is showing us daily that if we will “seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness,” that all of our needs will be met.

In the Presence of Witnesses

Today, I found myself wrestling with the question of mycall and my role in it.  The Lord has been calling me to focus more attention on the call, but I have been fearful that because of our current difficult circumstances, I was being neglectful in my role as a father and husband.  

This morning I was ministered to by a council of Godly co-laborers.   One dear brother, as he was leaving looked at me and said:  “1 Peter 5:10.”   One of the other men asked, “Why did he say that to you?”  I responded, “We’re about to find out…”

1 Peter 5:10 (NASB)

10 And after you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to His eternal glory in Christ, will Himself perfect, confirm, strengthen and establish you.

We then began to talk about our yoking to Jesus and how our burdens are lessened as we work in tandem with Him.   Another man then shared a story of a friend who followed the Lord’s direction, but continued to miss what he thought he was looking for.  It was pointed out that faithfulness and obedience was what the Lord was seeking…not the completion of a task.   Many times the difficult places and circumstances we find ourselves in are not due to bad choices, sin or any other heinous action.   The real reason we find ourselves in that place is because we have simply followed Jesus there.

Over the course of the afternoon, I found my resolve being wishy-washy.   Carol began to speak to me about the refinement process and its preparation of my life for the things ahead, but she emphasized my calling and my work were already clearly defined.   During our Organic Group tonight, I asked “Where do you most need to experience the powerful presence of God in your life tonight?”   Carol’s answer once again returned to the refinement process and call of our previous conversation.   Carol asked the Lord to empower me with a committed Spirit that would not waver under an adversity to the work He has already laid before me.

As we spent a few moments in silence, I was reminded of Elisha:

1 Kings 19:19-21 (NASB)

19 So he departed from there and found Elisha the son of Shaphat, while he was plowing with twelve pairs of oxen before him, and he with the twelfth. And Elijah passed over to him and threw his mantle on him.

20 And he left the oxen and ran after Elijah and said, “Please let me kiss my father and my mother, then I will follow you.” And he said to him, “Go back again, for what have I done to you?”

21 So he returned from following him, and took the pair of oxen and sacrificed them and boiled their flesh with the implements of the oxen, and gave it to the people and they ate. Then he arose and followed Elijah and ministered to him.

It was very clear to me as the old hymn says:  “I have decided to follow Jesus.  No turning back, no turning back.”  With this prompting from the Lord I made a public commitment to throw myself wholeheartedly into the task He has given me and to discontinue asking about other “work.”  The Lord impressed upon me that I needed to have the group annoint my head with oil and pray over me in affirmation of this commitment.
By the way, today’s miraculous provision was the bed of my pickup full of groceries while I was praying with the council of Godly men.

At Least the Rent is Paid

Today was another day of seeing God’s amazing provisions at work.  We woke up this morning unsure of whether or not we would be able to pay the rent and God provided.   There are still needs that are before Him in prayer, but hey at least we can continue to enjoy the provision of a home.

Over the past few days the Lord has been giving me a vision for South Bluff Park and the neighborhood in which Simplicity is located.   I had the opportunity to share these thoughts with a like minded acquaintance and his eyes lit up as we talked.   

The principles of the vision are pretty “simple”…imagine that.   First and foremost is the need to live out authentic Christian community in front of the neighborhood.  My thoughts are gravitating towards weekly worship in the park, led by a variety of churches.   Each week would conclude with a meal and then care and maintenance of the park.

The second part of this vision is revitalization of the area through volunteerism.   My thoughts here are to join with the city to form an enterprise zone.  Any business that is willing to located in this part of town would be offered tax incentives and volunteer help for cleaning, painting, sheet rock, etc… by local church volunteers.

These thoughts are very much in their infancy, but the Lord gave me an example to pattern after when I was in Pittsburgh, through the ministry of John Stanley and the Uncommon Grounds Cafe.

The weekend in review

Yesterday several of us returned to South Bluff Park.  The need to return for more ministry in this park was laid heavily on the heart of one of our ladies.   She ended up being ill and unable to make it, but she lovingly prepared sandwiches for the hungry wanderers who frequent the area.   Others who participated provided chips, drinks and a desire to let Christ be seen in their lives.

Our time in the park was a time of contrast.   We met and prayed with folks like Adam, Will, Smiley and Jenny.   Each one with a unique story.   As we were praying and serving one group of people, 100 yards away another group actively utilized the men’s restroom for illicit activities that involved a steady stream of customers.   As we took note of the contrast, we asked the Lord to pierce the darkness with the light of His love.

Yesterday was also a day of provisions for my family.   A check was received that will allow us to pay one or two bills.  Money was also received that covered the cost of a month’s supply of my medications.   When we returned home an envelope was found in our mailbox with the following words:  “You have been on my mind lately and I felt that you might need this.”  Inside the envelope was a gift card to a local grocery store.     Last night we welcomed friends into our home to celebrate with us our ability to call a place home after 2 1/2 years.   The provisions for the meal came from friends and the fish caught on our wedding anniversary.  At the end of the night we were blessed with our latest need…toothpaste and an additional package of toilet paper.

Today during our Sunday worship gathering, we were treated to the gift of music as the Holy Spirit led us through songs about God’s faithfulness and the firm foundation of His presence.   He allowed us to sing a new song that a couple of teenagers had written after a church camp nearly 6 years ago.   The Lord’s presence was strongly felt throughout the morning.

This afternoon, I received a call from a man in Rockport.  He had seen our ad on Craigslist for the house church we are working to launch on Padre Island.   This man has worshiped in a house setting since 1971 and recently moved to Rockport.  He and I agreed to work together with Holy Spirit’s guidance to form a group in his home.

Through all of these things the Lord has continued to affirm the decisions made on Wednesday.  My efforts of laying a financial foundation had caused me to neglect the very call that they were meant to support.   The Lord is helping me to define a proper balance in my life.   The work of the Kingdom is much to0 important and the time is much too short.   This week I will be seeking to further clarify God’s balance for vocation and ministry.

The journey of faith is a crescendo as the house payment is due in two days and there are still bills in arrears and needing to be paid.   The lesson of this past week has been the power of God to maintain joy and peace even when circumstances are not in your favor.   I find that this critical place is refining me in ways that can only be described as tremendous.

My late friend Daniel Trickey made a sign for me nearly a decade ago that has hung in my office ever since.   The sign simply says “Tumultuous to Tremendous.”

God even cares about toilet paper

Ok, so God has us on an incredible faith walk at the moment.   Unpaid bills, half empty cupboard, no clear answers…just faith in daily doses.   The most powerful thing that has been visible thus far is the unshakeable joy and peace that Carol and I have.

Last night when Mike and Kim were over for Organic Group they both commented on the night and day contrast in us compared to our anxiety levels when our housing was up in the air in late January.   They said we were almost like different people from who were just 60 days or so ago.   This in itself was a huge answer to prayer.  I had asked God, to change me, even if you don’t change my circumstances.   I want to be “ok” no matter what my circumstances say.

For the past week or so, we have had less than $10 to our name.   Today we were down to $4 and out of toilet paper, kleenex and anything else that could be used on the daily necessities of the human digestive system.   We were also down to our last package of meat.

This morning as Carol and I prayed, I made a specific prayer for toilet paper along with the other needs in our life.  This morning we received a call from one of the ladies in our church who is moving next week.  She had a refrigerator full of food she needed to give away before she moves.   Later in the afternoon another friend called with a supply of groceries for us.   Not only did God provide basic staples in these provisions, but He even provided the kid’s favorite brand of macaroni and cheese.

Along with the groceries, my friend gave Carol $20.  This $20 was just enough to buy toilet paper, dishwashing soap, trash bags, paper plates and styrofoam cups.   This provision met the basic needs we have for the next 24 hours.

I still don’t know how God will choose to provide for those things that are currently past due, but I know if He cares about toilet paper, He also cares about our financial obligations.

Out of Order

Tonight I had an awakening in my soul.  I have been wrestling with confusion about who I am supposed to be at this moment in time, knowing the greater call on my life, but trying to decipher it in light of my circumstances.   The Lord turned the lights on for me this evening while my wife and I were talking.

Several months ago the Lord began speaking to me about needing to have my foundation set.   I took that to mean my financial foundation, but I realize now that was only a small piece of that instruction.  My call in life is the planting of churches and raising up of church leaders, but I have neglected laying those foundations, because I have been consumed with trying to get a financial foundation built.

The Lord helped me see tonight that I had taken on the wrong role.  I am to walk alongside those who have been called to marketplace ministry, helping them to maximize the effectiveness of their businesses for the purposes of the Kingdom of God.   It is through these relationships and my “supporting role” that the Lord will support my ongoing work, which is not to run companies, but to plant churches and raise up church leaders.

Commerce is meant to be a tool of support for the ministers that I raise up, but not their primary focus.   The Lord has not delivered me from my circumstances, because my priorities were not squarely in line with His.   Additionally, the Lord has given me the release to shut down my financial advisory practice…a place of trust, a place of putting my focus in order.

Matthew 6:33

Seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness…

Desolate Places

About 6 weeks ago, the Lord began to speak to me through several people of lonely times ahead.   The main thrust of the message was along these lines:  “Even if it is just you, keep pressing on and don’t give up.”   I am so thankful that the Lord was preparing me for such a time as this.

In these last 6 weeks I have seen people move on from our ministry, I have had others act as though they never even knew me and my greatest well of strength was capped off and sealed.   Financial deadlines have come and gone with no answers revealed and everything I have set my hand to could best be described as barren and lacking in fruitfulness.

Sounds pretty dismal doesn’t it?  It certainly is not much fun, but it would have been much worse without the warning.

A few days ago, I was really struggling as I watched a financial deadline come and go without deliverance for the need.  I often discuss that in my life God tends to operate on the 11:59:59 principle…arriving at the last second, but right on time.   This time however, there was no deliverance…the deadline came and went.   So I retreated to a quiet place and poured my heart out to the Lord.   His instruction to me…go to the beach.

As I followed the Lord’s prompting, I drove to the Padre Island National Seashore.  I parked my truck, kicked off my shoes and began walking along the water line.   After nearly 45 minutes of walking  began to see a figure in the distance that I at first thought was a radio antenna.  As I drew closer I found that what I had been seeing was not a radio antenna, but a barren tree.   Actually it wasn’t even a barren tree, but instead was a 12 foot tree limb that had been planted in the sand.

Under normal circumstances, this tree limb would not even be noticed.  In fact, it would be dismissed because it was barren and distressed; however, on the seashore this tree limb is magnetic.   It is the only thing standing for miles of shoreline, and because of that distinction you are drawn to it.  You find yourself wondering what it is, and on closer inspection you find that it has been planted in the sand.

As I looked at this scene the Lord began to speak to me about my circumstances.  He pointed out that my life is much like that branch.   He has planted me in a place of isolation and loneliness where my life becomes magnified to all who see it.  The sight of a man standing under such difficult circumstances draws them closer.   As they come closer they see the establishing work of God taking place in my life.  If I had been planted in a lush, fertile environment, God’s work in my life might be overlooked; however, it is through my unique presence in such a barren place that His work become prominent.

I must admit, I didn’t at first find much peace in those words…in fact, they were somewhat difficult to hear.   Then the Lord showed me something else.   He had me turn around and look out at the waves as they came ashore.   He had me take note of the pelicans flying over the water and the crabs in the sand.   He reminded me that this sad looking tree had something no other tree had…a front row seat to the beauty of the Gulf and all that comes with it.

This morning, Mike led us through the transfiguration.   The Lord again spoke to me some deep truths during this time.  The two men who appeared with Jesus were Moses and Elijah…two men who knew what it meant to go it alone.  We speculated as to what the conversation might have been, and I felt impressed that some of it was a reminder that the path of glory often includes extended visits to desolate places.